Mistaken Identity
by LokiRavenscraft
Summary: Oneshot. Kidd goes on a shopping trip and ends up buying a...WHAT?


Kidd stared at the cage in disbelief.

After the crew's last pet had been washed overboard in the last storm, they had been begging him to get them another one. Honestly, the supernova didn't care if the ship had a mascot or not, but a pet seemed to be a good morale booster. All things considered, there were days when he didn't like to have to throw things at the crew to keep them in line.

With this thought in mind, he had begrudgingly informed the crew he was going to get them another pet, under one condition. It would be one he picked out. After all, he didn't want to put money into something only to have to kill it a week later because it got on his nerves. It was a waste of money.

This was how he found himself in one of the strangest pet shops on Grand Line, standing in front of one cage in particular.

"What the hell?"

The puppy inside was...scarily familiar looking. Black fur, white spots, and a yellow-gold tummy, tail, ears, muzzle, and feet. The resemblance was _uncanny._ Maybe Killer ate a Zoan fruit? No, no, no way in hell would his first mate do something that stupid_...right?_

**...Fuck.**

"Killer?" The redhead whispered as the dog cocked it's head and let out a soft whine. Kidd's eyes narrowed, and the little puppy stood on it's hind legs while it's front paws made a wheeling motion.  
The supernova straightened with a bit-off curse, and picked up the cage holding the small animal.

"How much for this one?"

* * *

"Alright Killer. How the hell did you get yourself into this?"

Kidd glared at the small puppy as it sniffed it's way around his cabin. Was he being ignored? That wasn't allowed.

"Oi, Killer! Answer me!" The captain hissed as he jabbed his finger at the dog. The little monster, as he was named in Kidd's mind, whined a bit and started to chew on his pillow. The irate captain stormed over and picked up the little beast, intending to force the answers from it, when the door creaked open.

"Kidd I...what the hell are you doing?"

Killer stood in the doorway open-mouthed as Kidd wheeled, holding the dog out with the rare expressions of shock and embarrassment on his features.

"What am _I_ doing? What are_ you _doing!" The captain snapped as he felt heat rise to his cheeks. He wasn't sure he liked the sensation.

Killer stepped inside the cabin fully and shut the door behind him.

"Kidd...why did you get a dog?" The massacre man asked slowly and carefully as Kidd's eyes slid away from his. A faint blush rose to his captain's cheeks.  
"I...ah...thought it was you."

A pause.

_"Ex__**CUSE**__ me?"_

Kidd brandished the lookalike puppy as if it was the be-all-end-all to the conversation.

"It looks like you! I thought you might have eaten a Zoan or something stupid!" He snapped, embarrassment giving way to anger. Even though the gesture hadn't been needed, he had gotten the dog with the intentions of bailing his first mate out. And of course he didn't get a thank you for this or anything.

"W-what? No it doesn't!" The blond snorted. As if he could be compared to something that looked so damn..._cute._ He was manly! A manly man who would leave his captain's cabin the instant he won this argument and eat a manly breakfast and do...manly...things.

Even though the dog really **did** look like him, he admitted to himself, he would die before telling that to anyone.

"I can't believe you're arguing this! It looks EXACTLY like you!" Kidd protested, feeling slightly off-balance with the whole conversation. First he had mistaken a very...squishy..looking puppy for a Zoan version of his first mate, then..._GAH_! This was too wierd.

"I swear to god! I bet if you die your soul goes into this dog's body!" He finished, and Killer planted his hands on his hips in frustration. The redhead decided it was a very effeminate gesture.

"We can't keep it." The first mate said snappishly, and Kidd snarled.

"Don't tell me what to do! We're keeping it, Captain's orders! If you die, this thing is your ticket back!"

"...Are you high?"  
"Not today!"

* * *

Killer Jr. scampered across the deck excitedly. He had finally been found, and by his human double, no less. This was important, because someday, that human body would be **_his._**

He stared at Killer the rest of the day.


End file.
